A week or so ago, I was introduced to the world of Google Docs budgeting -- added: a copy right here! It's not any different than just tracking your expenses on a Microsoft Spreadsheet, but being able to share and compare budgets is kind of fun. George's first comment was "Your dining out and play budget is higher than both me and Ameer's combined!" That is likely technically true because while other people have cars, loans, mortgages, insurance, savings, stocks, bills, memberships, a future, etc. I don't really have any of those things.
My fixed monthly outlay is rent, cell phone bill, and Netflix account. Well, now a Wifi bill because we are finally getting Internet for our house instead of stealing it from the coffee shop downstairs. Since this is my year of actually having money, that has left me more disposable income than usual. What else am I supposed to do except spend it? There's a reason I should never have money: I blow right through it.
Analyzing my (huge over)spending during January, I've come up with an incomparable budget moving forward. Most of it is dedicated to the aforementioned food and play, as just stepping out into New York tends to cost $50-100 each time. Seriously, how the hell do people live here? I don't even drink but simply hanging out, or catching dinner and a movie is like fifty bucks. Plus I've been taking cabs home because of the time of night -- or weather. It all added up to a January that saw me more than double up my budgetary goals. Whoops.
In my defense, a lot of that was spent for Celtics tickets and replacing the iPhone, but that does not account for the ridiculous amounts lost to the mysterious "cash" category. Lately I've been thinking I really need to rewatch Don't Tell Mom the Babysitter's Dead. "I'm right on top of that Rose!" has been ringing through my head and I've said it out loud but nobody gets my reference. Anyway, DTMTBD was strangely influential and also taught a generation what petty cash was. There's even a "DTMTBD taught me what petty cash is" Facebook page which I just thumbed up, but you can Google that for yourself.
The upside of not having money for awhile is that I never shopped. Now that I have some money, I have bought more random shit than I really need. There's a fierce shopper in me, he's just been kept sedated by a lack of suitcase room and cash. (Most of my teen years were spent as a mall rat. I knew all the local malls like the back of my hand. Like I still know where all the stores from twenty years ago in North County Fair were.) Now I've got like, extra towels and sheets and more clothes than can fit in two suitcases. Plus a heater, a humidifier, and other things I'll have to dump when I move away. And did I recently pay twenty five dollars -- with shipping -- for four pounds of gummy penguins? Yes I did.
Who really needs four pounds of gummy penguins?
The gravy train may end in early spring, as the job job pays an undetermined, variable amount so we'll see how that goes. Right now I actually have savings in the form of book money, but that has been earmarked for potential travel and a forthcoming huge tax hit. So it could be back to the poorhouse soon. Anyway, for February, we're all going to try to stick to our budget and I'm gonna come in under. With the help of Google Docs -- and Mint -- I'm gonna become the stickler that George is about her expenses.
We can't all be accountants but we can all aspire to be anal like one.
Speaking of numbers, here's an article about a woman who wrote a book called Data, A Love Story: How I Gamed Online Dating To Meet My Match. Aside from being super bitter about not having written this book, I enjoyed the article for its sheer exhaustiveness. The author drops a seven two point list about her ideal romantic partner. Then she parsed it down to a few tiers, and assigned a point system. Of course, I've basically already done this, a wish list for potential date-tees. I'd link to it but I haven't looked at it in awhile and it probably need to revision. Suffice to say, numbers one and two are still "must read books" and "must have Gmail." Those remain unchanged.
Oh who am I kidding, here's my list: The Girlfriend Experience.
It runs 30+ items long and I ended up having more criteria than the other people I made the list with. Also, my friend said that "there isn't a nit you[me] can't pick on someone." That statement has rung in my head for a couple of years and it both concerns and worries me. Redundant, I know. Do I always nitpick? Am I too choosy? My gut reflex is to say "no," because I'm a romantic. I mean, if I was such a nitpicker, why haven't I dated anybody who remotely looks like this list?
And by "romantic" I mean I lose all my sense when I'm into someone. Every negative is a positive, every positive is a one in a million trait. "Ugh, she's just so nice! You can't find that these days!"
Basically I'm an idiot.
Related but unrelated: "Friends of a Certain Age: Why Is It Hard to Make Friends Over 30?" The article kind of sucks but in it is a bit about a woman who "has even developed a playful 100-point scale (100 being best friend forever'). In her mind, she starts to dock new friend candidates as they begin to display annoying or disloyal behavior. Nine times out of 10, she said, her new friends end up from 30 to 60, or little more than an acquaintance."
Now that is someone after my own heart.
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