Shows recorded on George's DVR

1. Glee
2. Brothers & Sisters
3. Grey's Anatomy
4. Real World / Road Rules
5. Top Chef
6. Project Runaway
7. Real Housewives of Orange County
8. Real Housewives of New York City
9. Tabatha's Salon Takeover
10. Real Housewives of Atlanta
11. Top Chef Masters
12. So You Think You Can Dance
13. American Idol
14. The Challenge: Fresh Meat 2
15. The Office
16. Jersey Shore

About them apples

On Clement Street, two doors down from the intersection of Sixth Avenue, there's a bookstore planted firmly among the rows of Chinese restaurants and knick knack shops. It's the only place within five blocks without signage in Chinese characters. The green awning advertises "New & Used Books, Music, & More" in plain old English. A large neon sign sits high above, ready for use when the sun sets. This bookstore closes at 11:30 pm on Fridays and Saturdays. I make a mental note to return and stalk the rows for a date. Any girl who's at a bookstore on a party night is a girl for me.

This is the Inner Richmond, known to locals as the real Chinatown, or perhaps Chinatown Part II. I am there in the afternoon, late to meet my friend after her dentist appointment. Rushing into the bookstore, I don't expect much. The sight of weathered walls of books, seemingly chaotic but actually carefully organized inch by inch, stretching endlessly into the distance tips me off that this will be an experience. Anywhere else I'd feel claustrophobic with the walls heaving inward, but in a bookstore I'm excited. Close confines means they've chosen selection over comfort. I like that. Most of the section cards are hand-printed and in a variety of fonts. It looks like a middle school hallway exploded.

Snudging my way to the poetry section (where I'm pretty certain my friend will be) I see a zine I purchased on Valencia Street last year, "Support" by Cindy Crabb. It's about sexual abuse. Next to it is another Crabb produced zine, "Learning Good Consent." This one's about well, consenting to sex. They are turned out facing the passer-by, under the "Issues" section. They are both indeed issues. I pick up a copy of each for three dollars apiece, thinking they could be useful as gifts.

The Lushes

For their joint birthday party, Robert and Steven rented the the top floor of a small and intimate bar in Nob Hill. The staircase in back is marked with a hand printed sign: "Reserved, Private Party." I'm carrying a big plastic container of red vines and this seems to attract attention. Whispers drift as I walk by. "Red vines! I want one, where are they going with that? Are you allowed to bring your own food in here?" As we make our way past the sign and up to the balcony, I get that thrill, the buzz when I'm allowed to go where other people aren't. It doesn't take much to feel exclusive.

From our vantage point high above the crowd, we can take in the whole expanse of the bar. We feel like kings (and voyeurs). Nobody looks up and we are soon fearlessly peering down. We wonder if the girl with the big framed glasses is cute or not. We wait for her to turn around. We watch as our friends enter the bar in small clumps. They worm their way through the mass at the door, search left to right, and eventually make their way toward the stairs. Not wanting to reveal our position, we only wave hello if they happen to look up and see us staring. Then we make funny faces and point excitedly.

Since we were the first to arrive, we wonder who else will show up. Will the birthday party be well attended, will the music suffice, will our friends have a good time. There is a lot of anticipation and guessing. Being unsocial, we stick together until the balcony is too full to remain islands. Then the party begins.

So easy a caveman could do it

There is a way that men talk when there are no females around. Derogatively and dismissively, I'd term it posturing but that's simplifying it too much. Basically, it's a stance of "Yes, I would fuck her, she would fuck me, etc." And then everyone falls into line as you expound on your manhood through primitive guy talk and peacocking. Despite having been around lots of guy groups in my life, this turn of conversation is always a jarring experience for me. My closer circle of guy friends are more likely to discuss feelings and emotions -- and what our favorite Mariah Carey song is -- than who's getting some tonight. We are utter failures at man speak. Or maybe we engage in those conversations around other guys, just not each other.

A few years ago, after a college-ish reunion, all the girls had left the premises and it was just the guys left in the backyard. The warm New York summer enveloped us and beers were passed around as we sat on lawn chairs bullshitting. One of my good friends was telling a particularly humorous and ribald story from his recent past. I was taken aback by the words (and tone) that were coming out of his mouth because in my experience with him, we were more likely to share stories about our respect for women or his struggle to remain celibate out of that respect. To hear him speak now made me wonder if he was putting on a show for the other guys, or if I'd just somehow fundamentally missed an undercurrent in our conversations. Or if I was just not being a dude enough. When in Rome...

The dichotomy of respecting the ladies and at the same time objectifying them, that's normal right? That's what our culture promotes and reinforces right? It's acceptable to have mothers and sisters and still easily slide (other) women into the bitch and ho categories right? This respect/disrespect for women thing wasn't an either or proposition correct?

Still not sure what I'm talking about? Here, look at this behind the scenes conversation between some contestants of MTV's Fresh Meat Challenge. In this clip, five of the guys talk about who's likely to hook up soon. To put it into context, Pete, the tall guy on the right, has already been Truth or Dared to make out with Laurel the previous night. And Vinny has been tagged as the yummy resident hunk. The clip is entitled, "Let's Talk About Chicks."

Okay, done watching? See the casual way of jokingly objectifying women, and speaking about them as essentially "brainless pieces of meat" (as my guy friend said after I showed him the clip)? And how about Vinny's analysis of a fellow cast member, "She played it off like she was going to mess with everyone, and now she's kind of backing off. She's just instigating, all talk." The group agrees, "Yup, all talk. She's all talk." And there it is, this girl has been branded and defined: cock tease.

This is a PG version of how a group of guys might talk about women but you get the idea. The verbal reactions, the cheering on and laughing, the body postures and quick chime ins. I watched this and tried to discern who seemed completely comfortable in the conversation, or who seemed to be just playing along.

What jumped out at me was Luke's reactions (Luke's in the red). During the "Straight, Gay, Single or Taken" clip from earlier, he declared "I'm single and I also like the vagina." Yet when Vinny nominates him as the dark horse to be the first one to "take a girl down," Luke's sort of sheepish about it. What's amusing is that the season trailer shows Luke making out with the resident gay this season, Ryan. So what does mean for our man Luke? For all I know the kiss was just a dare, or something done to be funny. Who knows. But does his semi-reluctance and slightly uncomfortable role in the the Let's Talk About Chicks clip mean anything? Is he less masculine than the other guys, does he maybe like men, does he respect women more or less than the other guys. Is it all a masquerade so he's the sensitive one? I dunno.

But as I was telling my fellow MTV fantasy owner, this video was like a little window into the guy talk world. And not to say that girls don't do the exact same sort of objectification, but this clip struck me as almost too revealing (and possibly repulsive) not to be shared. So, enjoy!